Lexie Shaibu-Lenoir has dedicated much of her career to uplifting the underrepresented voices of queer Black women and women of colour in travel and hospitality, and over the years, she has seen an encouraging shift towards greater inclusion. However, as she shared during our first-ever Icons of Inclusion event in 2024, much remains to be done to level the playing field. We caught up with the LGBTQ+ advocate, content creator, and wedding planner to revisit her key points and learn how travel can move forward.
A wedding is supposed to be one of the most joyous and cherished moments in a person’s life, so it is no wonder couples pour their hearts into planning and perfecting every detail. The same holds true for LGBTQ+ couples gearing up for their big day, though their path to the altar often comes with its own set of unique challenges and considerations. While many couples may deliberate over choices like roses versus peonies, a live band or a DJ, or whether to opt for an elegant ballroom or rustic barn, LGBTQ+ couples must first confront some other looming questions: Will they be met with respect and understanding? Will vendors treat them with the same care and attentiveness as they would treat others? Could they perhaps even face refusal of service? For those dreaming of a destination wedding, these concerns only multiply, with couples having to factor in the cultural norms, social attitudes and legalities of the places surrounding every pretty venue on their mood boards.
With 15 years of experience in luxury hospitality and event planning – and being a queer woman of colour herself – Lexie has long been aware of the industry’s blind spots when it comes to tailoring experiences for LGBTQ+ people. During a pandemic lockdown, the Parisian living in London decided it was time to step up and fill the gap herself, founding Queer Weddings, the first-of-its-kind independent wedding planning company in the UK exclusively catering to the LGBTQ+ community. Lexie works closely with couples to curate the wedding of their dreams, ensuring every detail is handled with care and respect, to create a space where couples feel seen, celebrated, and entirely at ease.
Wedding planning is just one dimension of the entrepreneur’s broader pursuit to promote greater visibility and inclusion for the LGBTQ+ community, particularly for queer women of colour who often find themselves left out of the equation. In addition to launching Queer Weddings UK during the pandemic, Lexie and her wife Aisha (founder of Moonlight Experiences) introduced ‘The Queer Nomads’ to the world – a shared passion project rewriting the narrative of what it means to be black and queer in luxury travel by being unapologetically visible and proud on their globetrotting adventures, which they document on social media. Chances are they’ve graced your Instagram explore page at some point (that’s if you’re not following them already). The couple also collaborates with travel and hospitality brands to deliver workshops on fostering diversity, and they are involved in UK Black Pride as Head of Operations and Head of Community Engagement.
Since our inaugural Icons of Inclusion event in 2024, Lexie’s work has continued to inspire and challenge the status quo, shining a light on the importance of inclusion. We caught up with her to see how the conversation has evolved.
It was inspiring to see you in action at the Icons of Inclusion event, Lexie. How did it feel to share your experiences and perspectives with a room of industry leaders, and to also hear the stories of those from different walks of life?
It felt empowering to be able to share my vision in a room full of leaders who come from different paths. There was a sense of vulnerability amongst everyone which I didn’t expect to see firsthand. We were all there to share our stories and learn from each other without judgment, and we forged authentic connections.
Were there any particular discussions that stood out to you?
I enjoyed the presentation by Debbie Marshall on ageism. It brought a new perspective on a topic I don’t see addressed often and allowed me to check my own prejudice on the subject.
Your business, Queer Weddings, focuses on creating inclusive spaces for LGBTQ+ couples to celebrate their love. How much did your personal journey as a queer woman influence your decision to work in the wedding industry?
Coming from a hospitality background, I was able to identify a big gap that I thought I could fill. My personal journey was the catalyst for the creation of Queer Weddings. I always say that it was ‘my calling’ to establish the company. It felt personal to have such a rich skill set and be able to use it for the benefit of my community. I did not see myself represented so I established Queer Weddings to remedy the lack of inclusivity and make a difference. Since then I have seen more and more LGBTQ+ wedding suppliers, and even attended my first LGBTQ+ wedding fair in November!
As a wedding planner, what kind of feedback do you receive from LGBTQ+ couples regarding their experiences with mainstream wedding services? Are there any common themes or concerns that repeatedly come up?
What comes up quite repeatedly is that couples feel misunderstood and that the service they received enquiring with other providers was inauthentic and almost forced. The language providers use isn’t adequate, and couples don’t feel cared for. It’s almost as if their business is not valued or even unwanted.
During the event, you mentioned that LGBTQ+ weddings are often treated as an afterthought. How do you think the industry can change this perception?
The wedding industry needs to understand that LGBTQ+ couples are no different than any other couple and need to be included in all marketing/promotional materials. I have done some beautiful multicultural weddings and would love to see more variety in what’s represented. The whitewashed narrative should no longer be standard, and we are seeing a change.
You’ve spoken about the importance of authenticity in DEAI efforts within the travel industry. What advice would you give to luxury travel brands that want to move beyond performative allyship to genuinely supporting diverse communities?
Companies need to do more research and reach out to different people. I feel that there’s a fear of going beyond what’s considered ordinary – a fear of being different and being a catalyst for change. If you are in a position of power and privilege, you should be a leader and a champion for diversity.
Are there any particular themes or topics you would like to see explored further at our next Icons of Inclusion event?
Something I would love to see more of is Black women leaders from all sectors.
For more on OutThere’s Icons of Inclusion event, read our recap of the day here.
www.queerweddings.co.uk | www.thequeernomads.co.uk | www.iconsofinclusion.com
Photography by Sarah Lucy Brown
